What if there were no hypothetical questions?
Today’s HOT LIST Link ( click the pretty blue link below to see today’s picks ):
$3,600,000
5400 E VIA DEL CIELO –, Paradise Valley, AZ
“Master retreat with separate sitting area opens to the private Zen Garden”
Zen Garden my all-natural butt! That right there is a dog park.
(Please turn in your guides to Pic #27)
Zen Buddhism reflects the connection between man and nature, nature and man, through an Earth, Wind, and Fire variety of elements such as rock, stone, plants, and water. This room’s got fake grass, stepping pavers, and a hose spigot. That’s more rock, paper, scissors than any doorway to a balanced breakfast of 8 minerals, vitamins, and Zenlightenment.
That’s a dog park. Which is awesome! Every dog owner has endured that stormy monsoon night with the sky rattling the house, windows flashing like paparazzi, and a poop filled pup staring hesitantly out the glass, shaking like Michael J Fox on his fifth espresso. This is that moment when nature and man’s best friend are conspiring to create a clean-up on aisle Number Two. Dog’s do not like to poop in the rain. C’mon, who amongst us does?
Imagine the convenience of having a dog park right off the Master Bathroom. Genius! We’re at what, $3.6 million here? Ok, maybe “dog park” is a bit too pedestrian for this price range. We’ll unleash a hip trendy name like “Bark Avenue” or “Sniffalgar Square” or “The Flea Circus” or “Pen and Ol Yeller” or “Yellowstone Park” or….oh yeah….the “Doo Drop Inn.”
Now That’s a dog park.
$280,000
10501 W CUMBERLAND DR, Sun City, AZ
“A wonderful Sun City home with great bones.”
Questionable word choice for a Sun City listing. Has anyone heard from the previous owners? The magical mystery tour of photos on display here suggests the camera’s shutter was left open while the photographer located their seeing eye dog. What we do know is this is a block-built home, which keeps things cooler than the other side of the pillow. They tell us the cabinets are made of wood, great choice. Beats construction paper. If we assume there are walls and floors and the place is not currently engulfed in flames, then this price for 2,128 sq ft of solar powered Coleman cooler is worthy.
$599,000
23002 E IVANHOE ST, Mesa, AZ
“1 acre lot near Eastmark and the new 24 freeway!!”
State Route 24 currently branches off the 202 freeway’s eastern curve, dead ending like Andrew Cuomo’s career at Ellsworth one mile later. The lack of length makes it the sampler spoon of freeway distances. This coming January ADOT will extend the 24 to Williams Field Road then drag it eastward to Ironwood. If these names mean nothing to you, consider yourself fortunate for not having driven beyond the outskirt’s outskirts to this bowl of dust and rust in Mesa’s nether regions. (sigh) Some of us do.
One year from now all of the lonely properties parked out here in this pleasantly private pasture of petite priced peacefulness will be within a mile of the Valley’s Freeway system. Cha-Ching! Vrooom! Path of Progress sighted on the horizon!
We can’t tell if this house is a Macayo’s that devoured a Taco Bell, or the other way around. Tell me there shouldn’t be a hostess station in that front room and a fleet of waiters warning people the plates are hot. Block built walls, lodgepole ceilings, with layers of Saltillo, this is the classic western ranch home, built to outlast any nuclear attacks, and shaped like a Klingon Warbird. Sorry, the nerd inside had to mention that.
BREAKING NEWS: This “rancher” was purchased two weeks ago for $645,000. That development company is shoveling this place back on market today, for a substantial loss. One can surmise they ran the numbers on remodeling 4,368 sq ft, after, rather than before closing that purchase. Oopsy!
This is like encountering a whino eating grapes. “Dude, you gotta wait.” This is not a Flip Zone….yet. That freeway is going to change things. Solid built long term hold here.
$949,000
8505 S BREEZY PINE RD, Mayer, AZ
“Located just outside of Prescott in the Prescott National Forest”
Want to get away? Those familiar with the route to Prescott may be acquainted with the gigantic American flag planted next to route 69, just beyond Mayer. That flag is roughly the size of a Wimbledon court, possibly tilting the planet during high winds. If you turn left there and drive into the great beyond until the odometer flips, you might reach this spectacular cabin in the woods. This place is not just off the grid, it’s down several dimensions, make a left at the black hole, drive up through a higher consciousness, use the cosine theorem, jog two vectors over and eventually you wind up here, two blocks south of nowhere’s middle.
What on earth is this doing on the Hot List?
Giving you a moment to dream.
Imagine going away until you are gone. No strings tugging on you, no tidal wave of digital darts firing at you from the inbox, no end of the world doomsday predictions pouring from the television screen. Just you, your old pal silence, and the metronome dance of a porch swing. Wind creeping through the trees as the scent of pine decorates your nose. Birds circling above. Deer steps from unseen hooves below. Pine cones tumbling end over end, branch by branch, caught by a carpet of needles.
By the way, no smoking. This place is a tinderbox.
They tell us to follow our dreams. Today those dreams can travel here. Far away from a world intent on turning brother against brother. A location untouched by the great divider’s chisel. A private perch suspended above the waves of madness and their societal abyss. Imagine peace. Calm. Quiet. Your spirit opened up like a book, the marvels of nature serving as ever pleasing nutrients until you heal. Can you feel that?
It’s a whisper. It’s your soul. When was the last time you two talked? You might not find the answers out here, but you’ll lose the questions. That might be enough.
It’s also a dog park.
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