Every machine can be a smoke machine if you operate it wrong enough.
Today’s HOT LIST Link ( click the pretty blue link below to see today’s picks ):
$2,199,000
3442 N 40TH PL, Phoenix, AZ
“From the moment you arrive you’ll be taken”
I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for $600 per ft Buyers, I can tell you I don’t have any. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for Sellers that overprice. If you price your property too high, that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will find someone to buy your listing.
You may have heard the phrase “Love the sinner, Hate the sin.” Introducing “Love the house, Hate the prices”…as we enter this year’s third wave of price spikes. List prices vaulted skyward all spring, then leveled out June to July, then blip spiked…for a moment…in the first week of September, and price tags have sort of percolated until this week: KABOOM!
Greed is not a financial issue, it’s an emotional response. This year’s Arizona autumn season lasted about seven hours, then we dove straight into the seasonal sweet spot of cool evenings and perfect days. If you were selling a property today, you would recognize it was standing in the grandest weather spotlight it will ever enjoy, and you would price accordingly. Here at Hot List HQ we sift through the pricing weeds every morning. This week the thicket has become dense, in more ways than one.
GET TO THE HOUSE DUMMY!…Ok. What we have here is a Chip off the old Joanna Gaines block, a gorgeous rendition of the latest trends in redneck vogue. The kitchen features waterfall countertops, glass tile backsplash (for the moment that wooden spoon flings homemade Trader Joe’s sauce), embraced by open wood shelving because…who uses dishes anymore? Thanks to Uber Eats we can say Goodbye cabinets, Hello exposed ceramic cocks! There is a farmer’s sink, of course, because of all the farming that will go on here.
Better Homes and Gardens, Bungalow, Vogue Living, Wallpaper, and every other interior design publication resting in the toilet bookshelf cradle show us THIS look is THE look RIGHT NOW, and darn it, this house sticks the landing. They nailed it. Bravo! MAGNOLIA-EFICENT! This home also offers parking for two cars and two million dollars.
$1,365,000
408 W VERMONT AVE, Phoenix, AZ
“Cradle yourself in a bucolic setting”
Bucolic –(adjective) – From the Latin word bucolicus, meaning “cowherd”
Everyone considered this
The Cowherd of the County
This home is located at Central and Missouri, which is pretty much dead center of the Phoenix Central Corridor. This location is to rural what Queen Elizabeth is to puberty. However…pause…they’ve done a fine job of disguising themselves as a rural property. There’s vegetable gardens, irrigated yards, a fruit orchard, and big old back porch for sittin’ and a whittlin’. Pass the sweet tea Aunt May! I’m parched! They also have something called a “free range chicken coop” which has me wondering what the Hell “free range” even means. Of course, I had to look up bucolic too. (cowherd sounds like bullshit)
There are two homes on the property, both elegant and modern in their design. The garage features air-conditioned workshop space, as well as “owned” solar power. As multi-generational properties go, this is an 11 on the 10 scale, even if you aren’t into bucolicism.
$2,500,000
5710 E Camelback RD, Phoenix, AZ
“OWN A PIECE OF AZ HISTORY!”
This home was “reportedly” designed by Jarvis Hunt, the world-famous CHICAGO Architect, known for that enormous collection of rectangular buildings with rectangular windows that litter the Chicago skyline. Simplicity is art. This is an almost famous property, known as “Casa Manana”, which was a scheduling term used by cheap Mexican labor back in the 1930’s. This is not the first time this “Historic” property has been on market (Sold for $700K in 2016), and as usual the Historical credentials arrive with the validity of a hand-written Driver’s License.
We know Jarvis Hunt was one of several men involved in the creation of the Arcadia Lodge. However, the architecture of these homes is dissimilar to the entirety of Jarvis Hunt’s renowned repertoire of squared brick buildings with large brick arches. These buildings served some function for the Lodge, nobody is sure what, the history has been lost over time. History is the torch that is meant to illuminate the past, but sometimes that flame gets snuffed out. We are left to guess. When history is written by the owners of a property, that history tends to be written to make people feel good about what they own.
That’s not history. That’s psychiatry. We can’t wait to see what this home’s history becomes after someone pays $2 million for it!
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